Perhaps galvanized into pop culture with things like the 80's hit by Salt'n'Peppa, sex is one of those topics that is far from taboo in the culture we live in. Yet while it rages in vogue in the culture around us, in the church it can still be a topic of great un-comfortability, uneasiness, awkwardness, and many times shame. Godly sex is not a lay-up. To do it God's way, in the midst of our current cultural climate, is far from easy or 'natural'. The natural self would have us exploit sex as something solely selfish, far from the beauty of God's design not only of pro-creation, but for mutual enjoyment, trust, pleasure, and sharing. I have witnessed among married couples in the church, that sex is often one of those topics that is off limits to discuss with a trusted friend and confidante. It's almost as if because we are so saturated by sex in the culture around us, that we compensate by swinging to the other side of the pendulum, never discussing sexuality in any sort of meaningful and helpful way. This is also true with the youth. Teenagers and even younger pre-teens are bombarded by sexuality throughout their daily lives. We must be willing to engage this topic in ways that are not only educational, but in ways that are directional, pointing them in the direction of God's design and desire for human sexuality (Mat 19:5; Heb 13:4; Gal 5:19; Eph 5:3; Mat 5:27; etc.). Christian relationships must have this topic on the table with each other. On the table to discuss, to pray, to seek help and input. If not, then we are likely left to our own devices and the directional guidance of the devil and his hosts (Eph 2:2, 6:12). Whether it's married couples vulnerably opening themselves to another couple (many times this is man to man or woman to woman, but includes conversing as couples) to talk truthfully about all areas of their lives, including their purity, and romantic and sexual lives, or singles and youth talking about their struggles to remain sexually pure in wholly impure world, we must bravely be willing to engage with each other. For it is the love we have for one another that will indicate to the world that we are truly his (c.f. Jn 13:35). How can we say that we love each other when their are major areas of our lives that we simply don't talk about with each other? (c.f. Jn 3:19-21) We must be bold enough, brave enough, and filled with the love of Christ to love one another sincerely (Rom 9:12) pushing past whatever awkwardness and unrest there is in talking about sex (and any other topics). Only then can we experience not only our sexuality as God desires, but our entire lives can be freed to be lived to the full as Jesus has promised (Jn 10:10).
